Well, paint my house.  Electronic Arts announced today that it’s been a whopping ten years since the release of the original The Sims on PC back in the year 2000 when the Dreamcast was beginning its slow descent into obscurity, StarCraft was the height of RTS gaming, and PC gaming still mattered the Tribes series was the coolest thing to play with your friends (for me, anyway).

It’s still hard to believe we’ve come a full ten years since then.  In ten years we’ve witnessed The Sims 2, console versions, too many sequels to even begin to count, and finally The Sims 3.  We’ve seen the evolution of one of the biggest franchises in video game history, and having had the fortune to review the third game The Sims has grown up into a graphically proficient, diverse, opportunity-laden world where an entire town is at your disposal, even if I didn’t initially have the sci-fi setting I loved so much.

The Sims is just one example of the enormous changes in gaming companies, franchises, and trends we’ve seen over the past decades, but even by that standard it’s a notable one.  Throw a party in your Sims’ villa or take them out to town to celebrate.  Happy birthday, The Sims!

All I needed to hear was that Half-Minute­ Hero – by itself unusual for a JRPG title – apparently satirizes the genre.  Growing up with Final Fantasy, Dragon Quest, and Tales exacerbates repetitive and archaic elements of JRPGs, so I had to check this out.

Developer: Marvelous Entertainment
Publisher: XSEED Games
Genre: RPG?
Console(s): PlayStation Portable

The verdict: Finally, a JRPG willing to think outside the box and poke some fun at itself.  Half-Minute Hero is very entertaining, thirty seconds at a time.

What comes to mind when you think of JRPGs?  50-plus hours of linear gameplay?  Immensely complex narratives?  Lengthy, beautiful cutscenes?  Half-Minute Hero takes all of the conventions of JRPGs and tosses them to the wind.  Marvelous Entertainment’s 8-bit retro can loosely be classified as a parody of JRPGs, taking typical JRPG stereotypes and reinventing them in imaginative and clever ways.   There are some rough patches, but nothing that stops Half-Minute Hero from being a thoroughly enjoyable experience.

Saving the world 30 seconds at a time

Half-Minute Hero doesn’t have a plot, per se, but the game’s greatest strength is an uncanny sense of irony the developer took to simultaneously poke fun at the JRPG genre and give it a nod of appreciation.  The titular half-minute aspect comes into play because every single quest is 30 seconds long.  You’ll have 30 seconds at a time to use your selected hero to attack enemies, complete side quests, complete a spell, or do any number of things to stop the latest diabolical overlord from ending the world.  There are four gameplay modes, each of which naturally emphasizes speed and a sense of frantic urgency that makes the game a blast to play.

Half-minute perspective

Hero 30 is the primary game mode, and plays most similarly to a typical JRPG.  An evil mastermind has cast a spell of destruction that will doom the entire world in 30 seconds.  Your hero must race around the world defeating monsters and gaining experience and gold until you are strong enough to take on the dark one.  If you find yourself running short on time, you can pay the Time Goddess statue to restore 30 seconds to the clock, giving you precious extra time.

Princess 30 is akin to a shooter; the Princess and her honor guard move through the landscape while the princess shoots at anything unfortunate enough to go near her squad.  Given how helpless the princess usually is in a JRPG this mode will feel cathartic to JRPG players.  It’s fun and chaotic but there are times when all the action gets a little too busy to make out what’s going on.  The simplistic formula also means things will get old fairly quickly.  Still, the rapid pace means dullness never sets in for too long.

Evil Lord 30 draws elements from real time strategy.  You are (what else?) an evil lord, and your objective is to kill all of the baddies in 30 seconds using summoned monsters.  The game utilizes a rock-paper-scissors component so different enemies have strengths and weaknesses.  There are some minor AI goofs when my summoned monsters seemed to forget where they were, but they minor and didn’t detract from an entertaining experience.  Knight 30 is also simple, but has a creative concept.  You need to protect a sage casting his own 30 second spell in order to destroy the evil one trying to destroy the world.  The action is a lot of fun, but your effective close range combat makes the traps you’re given unnecessary in most situations.

Replay value, one pixel at a time

Collectively the four gameplay modes provide an impressive ten hours of replay value though individual missions last a few minutes each.  This may not sound like much and may disappoint old school JRPG fans, but given the short length of the missions ten hours is still admirable.  The rapid pace also eases any repetition brought on by the same objectives, not to mention the difficulty ramps up as you’re tested in a number of different ways relating to the power of enemies and the time mechanic.

Half-Minute Hero presents itself as a retro homage, and for NES veterans it will be a charming throwback to days before water-reflective surfaces or even 3D.  The graphics and sounds are highly reminiscent of 8 and 16-bit technology and it gives the game an endearing charm.  Environments are deliberately threadbare to emphasize the time period we’re in, but everything is colorful and cutely designed.  Sprites for monsters and characters are exaggerated and over-pixelated to emphasize the atmosphere.  Even the text and menu have a retro feel to them in the way they look.  Marvelous Entertainment didn’t use this as an excuse to cut corner; in its own way the game looks great, and there’s no slowdown even when the Princess 30 missions get frantic.

Conclusion

JRPG game, homage, and satire; Half-Minute Hero is all of these rolled into one.  Objections do get a little repetitive, but the pacing makes the experience a lot of fun and the sheer charm of the game makes it hard to resist.  It’s easy, accessible, and bound to make older gamers feel warm and fuzzy.  Even if you aren’t the biggest JRPG fan (indeed, this might help), Half-Minute Hero is a worthy addition to any PSP library.

Good ol’ Tekken.  This is a fighting series that has endured the test of time, and now the sixth game of the primary series has landed in arcades, consoles, and even the PSP.  So how does the PSP version hold up relative to its console counterparts?

Developer: Namco Bandai
Publisher: Namco Bandai
Genre: Fighting
Console(s): Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, PlayStation Portable

Disclaimer: This game was provided by Namco Bandai.

The verdict: Tekken 6 looks great, plays wonderfully, and packs an impressive amount of content onto the PSP.  It just gets old even faster than its console counterparts without the online play.

The concept of a fighter is something that would inherently fit well on a portable: Got ten minutes before your flight leaves?  Break out the PSP and K.O. a few opponents without having to run around looking for a save point.  All you need to do is make sure is that fighting game in question utilizes the full power of the PSP to offer an enjoyable experience.  Thankfully, Namco Bandai has brought the same enjoyable sixth iteration of the Tekken series to portable grounds, albeit with some expected trimming in terms of content.

Adjusting for new accommodations

Tekken 6 on the PSP may make some players wary because some cutdown is going to be inevitable, but the portable version of this game is as solid as you would get on a regular console.  No corners were cut from the experience itself.  The roster features a whopping 41 fighters ranging from series favorites to some superb newcomers from Tekken: Dark Resurrection, as well as newcomers for Tekken 6 itself.  Longtime series fans will notice that some tweaks have been made to existing characters in terms of move sets and abilities that help balance gameplay and emphasize different fighters’ strengths and weaknesses.  Most fighters are still generally accessible to newcomers, but veterans will easily be able to familiarize themselves with favorite characters.

It’s also nice to see Tekken 6 maintaining a sense of humor; the developers obviously didn’t try to take the game too seriously.  It’s not quite as silly as Soulcalibur: Broken Destiny, but Alisa is a good example of the game’s willingness to have fun.  Alisa is a new character who happens to be an android.  Her abilities include using chainsaws mounted to her arms and literally detaching her own head and using it as a bomb.

Round one, FI-okay, I’m done milking that joke

Beyond the character roster, the combat itself is a blast.  Abilities are used via the face buttons and stringing together moves and combos is a fairly robust process.  Characters all feel unique (even if they don’t have chainsaws for arms) and have their own play styles.  The variation on character styles makes for a fair amount of strategy.  Mashing buttons or just backing up and blocking will work up to a point, but like any repetitive strategy weaknesses will quickly be exploited.

Part of what makes the experience rewarding is how well the PSP has been used technologically.  While it’s true that the graphics are a step down from the 360 or PS3, they look fantastic for the PSP.  Character models and animations are smooth and crisp and environments are detailed and colorful.  Meanwhile, sounds like fierce shouts to accompany attacks or bone-crunching hits that land on the intended target come through crystal clear.  In short, technologically the game runs beautifully and only serves to make Tekken 6 on the PSP more enjoyable.  I’m not as keen on the music, which seems to be setting an epic feel, but just comes off as annoying and bombastically pretentious.

Game modes: The good and the bad

The only real difference between the PSP version of Tekken 6 and its console counterparts is the removal of the lengthy Campaign Scenario mode, which shouldn’t disappoint too many fans.  It’s a safe bet to say that few people care enough about the story of Tekken to let this be a deciding factor, since what we’re really here for is the combat.  The other modes focus more on combat and less on story and are subsequently more entertaining.  Arcade and Practice are the self-explanatory bread and butter of fighting games, measured by how good the combat in any fighter is: In this case, standard but very enjoyable.  They still spice things up because in Arcade mode there are some neat little additions, such as characters gaining ranks and five difficulty levels, all of which have level-appropriate AI.

Things get more interesting with Challenge mode, which features a litany of modes including Survival, Time Attack, and Gold Rush (where you get money for attacks, ala Super Smash Bros.).  Ghost Battles match you against AI opponents with different ranks.  What’s the reward for all of this?  The money, of course.  In Tekken 6 money can be used to purchase customization options for characters, including various clothing parts and even sound effects.  It’s nice to have a reward for fighting, although customization options are fairly limited.

While the offline single player modes are fun, after several hours you’ll pretty much know all the motions, and online is inevitably limited relative to the console counterparts.  The only way to play multiplayer is locally if someone has another Tekken 6 UMD disc on the PSP, and without the robust online system found on Xbox Live, Tekken 6 PSP’s most glaring weaknesses is exacerbated.  Replay value is fairly limited, especially if you’ve played previous games, meaning you will likely be familiar with the combat and core gameplay mechanics.

Final round

In the end, the Tekken 6 PSP version definitely holds up, but it’s a matter of what you personally want out of a fighter.  If online play matters to you, then steer clear; if you’re willing to trade a graphical downgrade and some content cutting in exchange for being able to play wherever you want, Tekken 6 on the PSP is definitely worth a look.

Given Activision Blizzard’s history with developing the Guitar Hero brand, many were foretelling a sequel to DJ Hero.  Lo and behold, Bobby Kotick has confirmed DJ Hero 2 in a Game Informer interview.

This might come as a surprise to some, given that DJ Hero failed to meet initial sales expectations owing to the hefty price tag and lack of group multiplayer that Rock Band has.    What’s also worth noting is Kotick’s comments regarding some of his rather controversial remarks in the past.  He described DJ Hero as “innovative” and said that ”It’s going to be less games, better games.  That’s our strategy.”

This was actually a gratifying read for me.  I would personally love to see a sequel to DJ Hero work, perhaps even with better support from guitars and microphone peripherals.   It’s nice to see an emphasis for quality over quantity, especially after a product wasn’t the mega-seller investors might have been hoping for.  We’re holding you to this promise, Bobby – don’t let us down!

What’s the first thing you think of when you hear Final Fantasy?  Is it epic battles, attractive cutscenes, or maybe mini-games?  Probably not that last one, but that’s the interesting direction Square-Enix took with Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers in an attempt to give the game more of a casual feel; it’s just as well, considering Crystal Bearers is a Wii exclusive title.  How does this new direction fare?

Developer: Square-Enix
Publisher: Square-Enix
Genre: RPG (sort of)
Console(s): Wii

The verdict: An interesting setting and world and some worthwhile ideas aren’t enough to save Crystal Bearers from ever rising about mediocrity stemming from interesting but repetitive mini-games and extremely lackluster combat.

The RPG reserves on the Wii seem woefully dry; it’s just as well, since just about every RPG I’ve seen on the Wii has been a dud.  Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers unfortunately has not done anything to help.  The game makes an interesting attempt to incorporate a casual audience, but all it does is demonstrate that some things do not mix: Namely Final Fantasy and casual audiences.  While the creative world and atmosphere are still here, bad design choices hold it down.

Swapping out magic for science

Crystal Bearers takes place a millennium after the original Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles.  Magic is outlawed, instead shoved aside by a new age of science.  There still exist individuals who can use magic appropriately known as “Crystal Bearers”, who are ostracized by the public for their abilities.  Enter the Crystal Bearer Layle, an easygoing mercenary caught up in a conspiracy when a routine mission goes awry.  An airship Layle is escorting comes under heavy fire by monsters, and a sequence JRPG clichés has Layle racing to save the world of Crystal Chronicles.

At its most basic summary the plot is typical JRPG fare, but it unfolds in a fairly unique way.  The story dispenses of the usual JRPG character archetypes and the overall narrative is interesting enough to keep most RPG fans playing.  The game’s biggest strength is the world, which drops you off in a bustling city after your airship crash-lands after the introduction.  There are a variety of different settings and terrains with uniquely designed characters along with Final Fantasy classic enemies.  The game almost feels reminiscent of Star Wars, striking a creative balance between whimsical and believable, and little elements like world news updates do a lot to enforce believability.  Everything feels augmented by the graphics, which are some of the most clear and crisp of any game I’ve ever played on the Wii.  Details such as leaves on trees and Layle’s hair give a sense of authenticity to the world and everything feels vibrant.

Conversely, the story and world take several immersion-breaking hits.  The English dialogue is extremely subpar, with characters spouting out unfunny jokes in broken, incomplete sentences that don’t hide the bad lip-synching.  Voice acting itself is even worse; characters make a brave attempt to “get into” their characters, but the result ironically backfires.  There’s a female photographer whose voice sounds like a screeching parrot, and Layle tries to sound like a hotshot but winds up being obnoxious.  Layle just isn’t relatable or likeable, and by the halfway point of the game you’ll likely want to deck him.

Cutscene, mini-game, cutscene

Gameplay gets off to a shaky start, falling into a very common JRPG trap: A lengthy cutscene where you have no control of your character.  Instead, there are a few mini-games that involve shooting at hostiles in midair as you fall from your ship and steering your vessel to safety.  This unfortunately sets the standard for what gameplay will be like and also raises a perplexing issue.  Why am I not allowed to control my character during a fight?  This happens repeatedly throughout the game and features some gameplay elements that should have been incorporated into combat but weren’t.

Gameplay is actually mini-game based, and the two above mini-games are actually examples of what a large chunk of your gameplay will consist of.  Most of them do make solid use of the Wii Motion controls and it’s a dazzling experience to fall through the air shooting at enemy targets, aiming using a cursor.  These combat oriented mini-games are actually a lot of fun and Crystal Bearers could have benefited from more of them, but a lot of mini-games revolve around silly, unnecessary things like ballroom dancing.  For every combat-based one that’s entertaining to partake in, there’s another mini-game that serves no purpose and just feels like padding.  Within  a few hours, the gameplay becomes so oversimplified that there’s no challenge or complexity to work through.

Ambition and shortcomings

Mini-games are admittedly an easier experience than actually controlling Layle due to several serious problems.  The only combat capabilities you have when controlling Layle directly is a gravity manipulating power that lets you pick up items and people and hurl them.  This was actually a really clever idea, but it’s never built upon or expanded.  All you do is go through the exact same motions of picking something up and throwing it; it’s as if the development team forgot about this part of gameplay because they were developing the mini-games.  It’s kind of funny the first time you use your gravity powers to lift up a city guard, but it’s a shame we aren’t allowed more gravity manipulation, since it was the germ of an interesting idea.

In general gameplay feels like the developers had impressive ambitions, but for every step forward they take half a step back.  There are some additions to the game that make it more worthwhile to play, like an achievements list with a whopping 330 tasks.  There’s a fair amount of gameplay to be had with around twenty hours, but again, there’s nothing really to do besides some minor exploration, the same repetitive real-time combat, and frequent mini-games with similar mechanics.

In terms of technology the game runs just fine, which is admittedly admirable during for how attractive it looks on the Wii.  Unfortunately, music doesn’t share the same high status as the graphics.  Most of the songs are obnoxious guitar loops that are too goofy to be taken seriously, and a few of them are a pain to listen to.  There’s no real sense of what the soundtrack wants to be; it’s just a mediocre offering of different types of songs.  I heard something that sounded suspiciously like bagpipes at one point.

Conclusion

I can see some ambition behind Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers but the interesting world and some clever ideas are buried under extremely awkward writing as well as simplistic and repetitive gameplay.  I can’t imagine that this is the final product that the developers envisioned, but as is it’s difficult to recommend to anyone but hardcore Crystal Chronicles fans.

It’s tempting to argue that arcade racers are a dying breed.  Between Need for Speed: Shift, Forza Motorsport 3, and the upcoming Gran Turismo 5, realistic racers seem to be taking the spotlight.  Ironically, after Need for Speed: Shift began the Need for Speed franchise’s apparent shift towards more realistic simulators, Need for Speed: Nitro has raced onto the scene presenting itself as a classic arcade racer.  How does it hold up?  Let’s take a look.

Developer: EA Montreal
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Genre: Arcade racer
Console(s): Wii, DS

The verdict: Nitro is fun, fast, and chaotic for a few hours, but it can’t muster enough variation and creativity to be star.

While the more realistic, simulator-leaning Need for Speed: Shift has been released for the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3, Electronic Arts has served up a pure arcade racer for the Wii.  Nitro definitely feels at home on the Wii: The races are fast, intense, and bring the “speed” part of the Need for Speed series.  The lack of content makes the fun get repetitive quickly, but Nitro is still a well-done racer.

3…2…1…

Nitro definitely has a more casual and family friendly audience in mind, which is why it feels tailor made for the Wii.  Pristine realism and crippling damage done by hitting other cars are elements that have no place in Nitro; instead, the game opts for a different (but still enjoyable) experience.  In a nutshell, everything is deliberately exaggerated and overblown in an entertaining way.  Cars are based off of real life models but look more like Hot Wheels toys than their real-life counterparts.  Environments and scenery also have a much cartoonier look to them, and everything is augmented with bright, cheerful colors.

GO!

However, you won’t have time to admire the attractive environments because most of your time will be spent watching them whip by.  Nitro delivers the speed part of Need for Speed very nicely, and with rewards for drifting and being more aggressive and reckless, roads will get pretty chaotic.  The game essentially rewards you the crazier you act, but even that wasn’t enough for EA Montreal, since they added police cars into the mix that will chase you.  All of this leads to a hilarious and thrilling experience that best represents what’s good about arcade racers.  There are even in-game items to quickly repair your car or provide other bonuses.

Chief among gameplay modes is Career Mode, which takes place across Rio de Janeiro, Singapore, Madrid, Cairo, and Dubai.  You progress by gaining stars related to various aspects of your race performance ala Shift, and despite the game’s laid back atmosphere some of the stars can be very challenging to earn, providing a fair amount of difficulty for racing veterans.  Arcade mode is more direct, letting players choose their own race details.  Both gameplay modes provide a lot of opportunities for the speed and road rage that make Nitro such an entertaining experience.

Not enough gas

The lack of description about gameplay modes provides a segway into the weakest part of Nitro: Lack of replay value.  As fun as the races themselves are, the charm can get old very quickly because you’re essentially doing the same things repeatedly in order to score stars and points across a very limited spectrum of locations.  There’s very little reason to keep playing after a few hours.  You’ll know all the motions and will be able to progress through career mode without any real difficulty, and with a scant 30 cars (on the Wii version) there isn’t much to discover.  There’s a somewhat robust customization system but even that is limited.

The game also carries baggage that feels almost customary for arcade racers, namely wonky physics that wind up being cumbersome even though exaggerated physics were the idea behind this title.  There’s no real way to measure how a collision or a tight turn will impact your car, and it’s difficult to discern whether clipping the hood of the car behind you will throw you off momentarily or send you careening out of control.  Differences between the various cars in terms of statistics seem very incremental; again, the physics seem to factor into this.

Closing thoughts

Need for Speed: Nitro starts off fast but the experience wears itself thin quickly.  Is it bad?  Not in the least; it just doesn’t maintain the momentum it starts out with.  The cartoony aesthetics and sense of speed are superb and the Career and Arcade modes are fun to play for a while.  Nitro never lets down, but it can’t quite achieve the level of success to recommend for every Wii user.  Whether or not this is worth $50 really hinges upon your love of arcade racers.  Give it a chance, but don’t expect to be wowed.

As Sega starts to release more details about Project Needlemouse, I’ve decided to compile a humble list of things Sega needs to do in order to resuscitate its beloved mascot.  Let’s see what they’ve already accomplished, and I’ll be sure to revisit this list when the game is released, especially since we’ve had a few promises like this before.  The promise of Sonic Unleashed to return Sonic to his 2D roots was undermined somewhat by the 3D werewolf sections.

Make the game 2D – Check (tentatively)

Easily the most important item on this list.  Sonic just fits naturally in a 2D environment.  Sure, Sonic Adventure was unbelievable when it first came rolling out on the Dreamcast red carpet, but in hindsight the game hasn’t aged terribly well.  The physics are wonky and aside from Sonic and Tails’ levels there’s no speed.  Sega has promised a return to Sonic’s 2D side scrolling roots, but again, Sonic Unleashed promised this as well.  We’re promised a “more 2D style of gameplay”, but what exactly “more 2D” means is open to interpretation.  Keep to your word, guys.

Make the games about speed

Another obvious one that Sonic Team has missed like a champ over ten-odd painful years.  The very name Sonic the Hedgehog should be pretty self-explanatory, but apparently not given some of the stupid gimmicks we’ve endured from Sonic over the past decade.  You want to bring Sonic back to his roots, developers?  Follow this one if nothing else.

Get rid of the other characters – Check

A Sonic game has finally dispensed of the annoying ensemble cast that has served no purpose other than literally slowing games down and irritating us.  In a recent press release Gamer Limit mentioned, Sega confirmed that the game will, indeed, be about Sonic.  No Amy, no Shadow, no Big, no more annoying sidekicks.  This is just all Sonic, all the time.  Tails and Knuckles are allowed to the party, but for the love of God, don’t give them slow, annoying platforming sections.  Remember Knuckles’ treasure hunting segments?  Treasure hunting, in a Sonic game?  Don’t make us relive this bitterness.

Ditch the stupid storyteller themes

I’m not sure who thought Sonic and the Black Knight was a god idea, but this was such an abhorrently stupid concept it wouldn’t have even worked in 2D.  Mind, I’m not referring to something like a “Medieval Zone” (which would actually be neat), I’m talking about a 2D Sonic game where Sonic would wield a sword and shield.  It’s too early to check this off the list, but let’s hope when Sega says Sonic’s roots, they really mean it this time.

He’s Dr. Robotnik, not Eggman

Robotnik apparently became Eggman from Sonic Adventure onward.   Since this coincides neatly with the sharp decline of Sonic, I say we give the doc his real name back.

Get rid of the voice acting

The voice acting in Sonic Adventure was passable, but since the overall quality has absolutely plummeted. The English translations sounds like they came from 4Kids and it’s literally impossible to tell Tails’ gender in Sonic Heroes or Sonic the Hedgehog 2006.  Like 3D, voice acting is another concept that isn’t going to work with Sonic.  Let it go so Sonic doesn’t have to be stuck in permanent baritone.

Get rid of the dialogue

What’s arguably worse than bad voice acting?  Bad writing.  Ever since the Sonic series went within ten yards of a script, it’s had writing egregious enough to warrant censorship.

Lose the token human characters

The original idea behind Sonic was that Robotnik had invaded the forest to turn everything into machinery. Well, Sonic games aren’t in the forest anymore and humans have an increasingly prevalent role in the games. It’s impossible to take interaction a talking Sonic and humans seriously and all it does is detract from the experience.

Follow these guidelines, and what do you get?  Hopefully the equivalent of the early Sonic the Hedgehog games.  Only time will tell.

As the long-awaited Final Fantasy XIII countdown continues, if you happen to live in California then January 13 sees your chance to play Final Fantasy XIII before anyone else in North America.  The bus will bear a demo of the North American version of the game and will be making stops throughout the San Francisco and Bay area throughout the 16th.  It can be followed on the Twitter site @PlayFFXIII.

I personally would rather see the game be released, but bravo for touring the game regardless.  I’ve never found outdoor buses conducive to enjoying games; the only time one of those buses stopped at a Gamestop in my vicinity I was playing the original Super Smash Bros. with a crippling glare from the sun.  I still look forward to playing the final product in March.

Since I’m original as writers come (which is why I make top ten lists, of course), when I saw Jamie make a post like this I had to steal it.

Forza Motorsport 3 and Halo 3 ODST – I got both of these cheap ($30 apiece) from the Black Friday deals on Amazon.  Who needs to stand in front of Best Buy at five in the morning when these deals become available at 11 AM?

Forza 3 was fantastic and I credit it with revitalizing my interest in racing games.  In hindsight it’s raced my standards for how I review racing games, since I reviewed Need for Speed: Shift but not this.  The vast amount of content and immersive atmospheres keep me coming back for more.

I enjoyed Halo 3 ODST, but it felt like there was something lacking.  It’s hard to shake the feeling that this was just a way to kill time until Halo Reach.  The campaign mode was fun, but it was over way too fast.

New Super Mario Bros. Wii – As part of a secret Santa within an organization at my school, I got a Best Buy card, which I put towards this.  It’s the most fun I’ve had on the Wii since Dead Space: Extraction, and the helicopter power-up is a lot of fun to use.  They also brought back the Koopa Kids!  Kudos, Nintendo.  I was still a little disappointed you couldn’t take Yoshi between stages ala Super Mario World, and some of the Wii Remote waggling was annoying.

Dragon Age: Origins and Batman: Arkham Asylum – These were actual gifts I got, and shouldn’t require too much explanation since they both tied for my Game of the Year.

Mass Effect 2 Preorder – I used another monetary gift to preorder the collectors’ edition of Mass Effect 2 on Amazon.  $70 for all the extra stuff is a fantastic deal, and this is the first time I’ve actually gone out of my way to buy a Collectors’ edition.

As we relish at the prospect of all the wonderful new games headed our way in this new year (and indeed, the new decade), I thought it would be a great way to kick off 2010 by discussing a vital component of media: Trailers.

Trailers are the link we have to visual media before the final product is released.  Trailers can be breathtaking, awe-inspiring, hype-inducing, and they also have some infuriating tendencies about them.  So I’ve decided to present a list of some important guidelines to keep in mind when making trailers.  Trust me, developers, we will thank you for it.  Some of these even apply to movies as well.

1.  Do not give away big spoilers in your trailers

“Jill, we traced the call, it’s coming from inside the house!” -When A Stranger Calls

A surprising plot twist that might have had a greater impact had it not been given away in the first teaser trailer for that movie.  In video game land, Mass Effect 2 (of all games) does this.  Tali’s character profile gives away a fairly important spoiler about her role in the story.  It’s not the ultimate secret of the game, but now we know exactly what’s going to happen to Tali.  When you do this, developers, you’re telling us two things.  Firstly we get the impression that there’s so little to market that you actually have to give away parts of the story, and we also know where the killer is going to be for 75% of the movie, or what’s going to happen to a character we all like.

2.  Know the difference between “cinematic trailer” and “gameplay trailer”

Video game developers, let’s clarify something: We don’t dislike cinematic trailers.  Cinematic trailers can blast our socks clear off our feet ala the one for Mass Effect 2.  We do take issue when you tout a gameplay trailer but wind up sneaking what are obviously cutscenes or pre-rendered movies in between actual gameplay segments.  Final Fantasy XIII pulled this with a few trailers, and Call of Duty 3 actually went the extra mile by including a pre-rendered cutscene from the first person perspective.  It’s false advertising and it’s grounds for us, say, buying a different game when we take our hard earned cash to Best Buy.  Speaking of false advertising…

3.  Do not aggressively advertise DLC without making it clear that it is DLC

Again, downloadable content itself isn’t bad.  Downloadable content finally gave us the ability to continue wandering the Capitol Wasteland in Fallout 3 if we were benevolent heroes courtesy of Broken Steel.  The problem is hyping up content that we then have to purchase on top of the game we’re already paying at least $50 for.  This has been an issue in just about every music rhythm game on a system that has downloadable content: One of the trailers for Beatles Rock Band showcased “All You Need Is Love” before we found out you had to download it.  In a similar vein…

4.  Only show us movie clips that are in the theatrical version

More and more, there’s been a very peculiar trend in the movie industry.  Films have been showing trailers laden with clips that never appear in the movie, although they often find their way onto YouTube or the DVD Deleted Scenes reel.  Not only is this false advertising, it’s giving us the wrong impression of what to expect, and just about everybody is guilty of it including all three Lord of the Rings movies.  Unfortunately, DVD releases mean it’s easier to stockpile deleted features and advertise then as something good, so this probably won’t improve any time soon.

5.  Stop using bullet time effects in trailers when the actual scene doesn’t use them

Bullet time effects remind me of that theme song from Battlefield Heroes: They never, ever go away.  Video games and action movies have relentlessly beaten a long dead horse by trying to capitalize on something that stopped being cool years ago and is nowadays more irritating than anything else.  A few movies and games take this one step further and have actually used this stupid slowdown effect in trailers even though the actual scene in the game doesn’t.  It’s bad enough that we see this stuff in the actual product, now you’re giving it to us in trailers, too?  Knock it off.

6.  Do not hype up content that we need to spend 50 hours unlocking

This brings back horrible memories of Super Smash Bros. Brawl.  There we were, all ready to play as Sonic the Hedgehog and have a real brawl with Mario!  We eagerly booted up our Wii systems, opened the character selection screen and…he wasn’t there.  After being touted in multiple trailers and even being featured on the back of the box as a new character, we had to either play for ten hours to unlock him or beat Subspace Emissary, which also took around ten hours depending on the difficulty.  This turns your game into a chore, developers, because we will spend hours grinding through the game that you (presumably) intended to be fun just so we can enjoy what you promised us.  The idea of unlockable characters has always been to surprise and gratify players by throwing in unexpected characters, locations, what have you.  Lately, this golden rule has been violated for the sake of hyping up a game.  This does not please us.

There you have it: As long as studios avoid some of these irritating pitfalls, we’ll be grateful.  Rather than embitter us or make us enjoy the game less, honest trailers will make for a much more rewarding experience to all.